My Photogenic Latte

I wrote this "segmented essay" for a Creative Non-fiction class I'm taking at the local community college. This post is basically a glimpse into my insecure life.


The Snap.

It’s yours. The perfect latte. Steaming, frothing, intricate hearts laced in the milky foam. Perhaps the best four dollars you spent. A perfect moment for Instagram. Let the world see your caffeinated day unfold. Everyone must know that you drink lattes. It’s cool to drink lattes. You’re drinking a latte. You must be cool. You hold your iPhone 7, remove the case as to not affect the lighting surrounding your perfect latte. Adjust the brightness, make sure your lens is focused. Your perfect latte perfectly centered with the silky marble table and the muted green succulent. Should it be on the right? The left? Off-centered? Centered? It has to be perfect. Everyone must see your perfect latte.

The Filter.

The latte is perfect. The photo doesn’t do it justice. Those foamy hearts aren’t bright enough. No one will know how perfectly caffeinated you are with your perfect latte. So the filter. Open the app. Scroll through filters. F2 isn’t faded enough, M3 is too faded. Maybe you should click the in app purchase button. The perfect filter will only cost you 2.99. It’s worth it. Everyone must appreciate your perfect latte. Best 2.99 you’ve spent, probably.

The Post.

It is finished. Will they like it? Did you use enough hashtags? Less than fifty likes requires immediate deleting of your latte. Your perfect latte deserves at least seventy-two likes, maybe a few comments. What if they hate it? What if you aren’t cool enough for the perfect latte? You burry your iPhone in the bottom of your disorganized purse. Must. Resist. Temptation. To. Delete. You sit at the coffee shop, twiddling your thumbs. Waiting. Waiting for the magic likes that remind you that your latte is perfect and you are cool.

The Likes.

It’s been seventeen minutes. Seventeen minutes since you posted the perfect picture of your perfect latte. Only twenty six likes. TWENTY SIX. Should you wait it out? Should you wait another seventeen minutes? Will those hashtags work? Will people appreciate the perfect latte, which is now room temperature and honestly not that tasty. You resolve to wait, wait for the magic fifty. Exactly thirty-seven minutes after you Instagram your perfect latte, it happens. Fifty- One. Fifty-One likes. You breathe a sigh of relief. Your latte is deemed worthy and with it, you are valuable. Your untouched latte is now cold and you’re running late to class, but at least your perfect latte is seen, liked and worthy. You can breathe.

Processed with VSCO with f2 preset

Dat lighting doe ^^